We’ve all got Ghosts

we've all got ghosts.

We’ve all got Ghosts. Ghosts linger in our energetic atmosphere, and not the kind that need salt and iron to banish. In reality all these horror characters are just our real lives crying out for a more dramatic reprise. People stay haunted by the ghosts of their trauma. Safe guarding our hearts by locking the […]

Things I’m Still in Love With

Things Im still in love with

I was thinking of the things I’m still in love with, and with me talking so much about how I am different, I  didn’t want you to think I wasn’t the same at all.  I’m still very much the same. I still love wrestling, read voraciously, move my house around every few weeks, eat too […]

What Changed Me.

what changed me

 What Changed me was when my friend Elana died. I dove off the edge of  the humanity I was living in. This whack into the reality of what living as a person really was all about so devastatingly close to my sweet little privileged life.  When Elana left her stardust body for the ether it […]

Astrology has Taught Me.

astrology taught me

Astrology has taught me so much but sometimes, being the fool for nostalgia that I am, I like to think of who I was before I started living like astrology was my first language.  This version of myself is not that far away after all- only five years ago, really.  Before this I understood very […]

Almost 41

almost 41

Almost 41. My last almost was 36.  Jeez. How is it only five years, yet feels like I got so much older? For me the back half of my thirties got real serious. I def think I have the wrinkles to prove it, but my kids tell me I am being ridiculous, and I don’t […]

My First Mothers Day in the Dead Mom Club

dead mom club

My first Mothers Day  in the Dead Mom club fast approaches, and though I try to release the importance of hallmark holidays I know this one will wash over me like an ocean tide.  Truth be told my Mother on Mothers day was always a risk. Her mood on every holiday  Depended on her own […]

My American Dream.

  Things shake out of me. Reverberating the bones of my chest on the way out, right at the spot where my heart is. I used to not pay attention, but I am trying to pay attention these days. I used to eat chips, I still do sometimes, and other times I think maybe the […]

Experiments in Soggy.

I am soggy I am not too sure when I got soggy, or if I was always soggy. I mean, I am not the fun friend, which could lead me to believe I was always destined for soggy. I am fun, if you are a child, I will break out the parachute, and Mary Poppins […]

Almost 36

I get caught up in my head all the time. I lose my ground, or hand it away sometimes, without noticing I did that. I usually have to be dragged out of places, Once you get me on the road I am a monster at life, but getting me out of the places I find […]

Ready for Love.

I like to feel important. That should correlate great to having kids, and an adoring husband, but I was raised to be love resistant. I see all the love, and instead jump into the heartbreak of the things I do not have. I was raised like that. I know a lot of us eighties kids […]