Astrology is all about cycles. Each planet running it’s own over and over again, against the patterns of our lives and times. We are going through the ends of things these days ahead, and to do those in a way that makes our future selves proud we will have to dissect those endings so we do not end up making the same mistakes. However the stars have us prone to want to cut and run, Irish goodbye, Disappear into the new life like the next one was always there.
This does not mean not to cut and run on that relationship waiting for the ax to come down on it, or the one that the ax came down but the debris is decaying on the stump you chopped it on because you are afraid to throw it in the compost bucket. The cutting and running is more in not wanting to do something different than you did the last time you were here in this situation.
To do that now you should look at 2018, but first lets get really clear about something no one likes to admit.
I love Astrology, but the truth in the stars has always been pretty rough for me to stare at. Not just on my own chart , but client after client I sit there while someone tells me they want great love, but there chart is on a journey of independence. I get charts where people want to run away from the one thing the need to uncomfortably charge into every time. The Astro tends to feel dooming. I have had a client tell hang up on me after I told her she was better off focusing on her higher education journey than her partner one for Christ Sake.
I myself find hope in what is true, not in what I wish were true, but you know my chart is built for that kind of sardonic optimism.
This Thanksgiving week will really want you to see what you see and not run away, but if you are looking right it will feel uncomfortable. You’ll know you are doing this wrong if you start blaming someone else, even if they are wrong. The rage will be easy to toss onto another like they were your closest neighbor in a game of hot potato, but
I implore you to hold the bag and keep looking.
My chart has clear markers that I should not trust my family of origin. My south node is in my house 4 in Capricorn. I stay home tucked away in my peace for Thanksgiving with my adoring husband and three rude ass kids, but there was a time when I tried hard to be the best daughter, cousin, friend and show up in places and include myself in places that were meant to hurt, but I am also an only child with a dead mom and a wandering dad so for me the triggers will not come around the dinner table on Thanksgiving.
However, what an easy trap for the rest of the world. It will be so easy to brush off the things that ping at your hearts walls to just being what so and so did and said, and that will be the true tragedy of the day.
I often sit and stare at the things the Astro tells me that I don’t like without doing much about it at first. Life is long if we are lucky and the astro takes a longggg time for it’s bigger impacting cycles to come around. I like to sit and stare at, and laugh at how rude it is, and roll my eyes at the never ending disappointments my chart set me up for.
The same chart that set me up to be able to think of the most fairy tale way it should all work out has also set me up to want things that I really should be saying no thank you too. The Astro is always an oxymoron asking you to pursue things you would not think to pursue if you had not seen the chart.
Back to 2018.
You should kind of be in a similar spot as you were then. On the preface of new with things clearing out whether you wanted them to or not.
What themes are present that were present then? Have you just done the same thing you did back then with new people or the same people you chose not to get rid of?
Whatever ended around that time, should be ending different this time because you learned something you did not know before. If you are doing things the same old way then I assume you have not looked at your astro.
This point in the game asks you to look back and be honest about who you are now. Who have you become since then? Are you proud of how you handled your choices the past several years? Are you proud of the way you are handling choices now? The themes will just play over and over again until you die, with a new cast if you choose to live in a delusion crafted by only the desires of the mind.
The truth is the best compass out of the dark, not what we want to be true, not what we know deep in our hearts but is not out in the light kind of truth either. The truth that sets you free now is the one that is in your everyday showing up in real time, not what shows up in the psychic hotline of it all.
I find myself again in a similar situation to Fall 2018 but the differences in how I fell and am handling it are enormous.
Back in 2018 I had no room for people to be who they were. I fought to save friendships that had no room to emotionally mature. These days I let folks go when they show me who they are. Peacefully, and when someone wants to fight to stay living in lies. I let them.
Maybe it has been so much easier to lose friendships now because I have not lost myself in any of the relationships I have had since 2018. Before then I was the kind of bestie that checked in and inserted myself to make a day better, but 2018 took all my favorite friends, and asked me who I was if I wasn’t there for people.
Back then I had two besties who were on the way out, but one was far more surprising than the other. That one got me in my feelings and when I tried to corner her with feelings she came with the Regina George and asked me if I liked her liked her.
I understood I still had some friend stuff to learn, but it wasn’t going to be next to her, and in no time the world had ushered in a new friend I would learn to do the things I could not do with Regina.
That friendship in true astro fashion phased out as soon as Uranus made it’s first ingress into Gemini and is fully out by it’s last. For me it was all about 8th house and Chiron stuff. A death of the friend, family member, daughter I had always been to who I am as that person now.
These days I let people be who they are. I am too busy trying to face my own to worry about who isn’t doing something with theirs. I don’t ever want to be that kind of person again, and that is hard enough with a chart begging to be loved, recognized and needed.
All the years spent giving to be loved and needed, to realize that I was never loved at all unless I was giving was not as devastating as one might think it to be because of my chart. It told me I wanted all those things so bad, but running out into the world and creating them would only bring me realtionships that hurt.
Do I always feel so mature? Nope. I have a Scorpio Mars a Gemini Moon and a south node in Capricorn. Lord knows I harbor deep resentments, but I know astro, and I know those things are just the sound from one part of me, and there is not need to act up in ways that satisfy insatiable placements in the chart, but you know I am just a person so I hope everyone that fumbled me in one of the many cosmic cycles feels it and I hope they read all the stories they inspire along the way asking themselves if it’s them.
Good Luck Out There.
xoxoxoxxoxo
