I listen to Wayne Dyer, Rumi, Ram Das, Thich Nhat Hanh, and Anne Lamott most recently. The one thing all these teachers have drilled into my head is that you have to heal something referred to as the inner child.

I get how lame that sounds.

I grew up in the early nineties for god sake. The cabinets got smaller in the pink and mauve newly built raised ranches, Mcdonald’s was an after school snack. I grew up where looking a certain way was more important than what you really were. Like every other kid who grew up in the nineties with a regular family. Spend money, do not make pie crust from scratch , look good at all costs, bangs up -nineties.

If the culture you were raised in doesn’t make you feel like a douche wad talking about healing your inner child, Or maybe you were born lucky enough to not give a fuck what generally crabby people have to say about the pursuit of happiness, then you can use this juicy excuse.

Saying your inner child needs healing means there was an injury, and since you have your limbs in-tact and all your children are breathing on earth then you have no right to have injuries. You don’t deserve sympathy for your privileged life.

Like I said before, ego is a douchebag. He looks really yummy on the outside but turns out to be a filthy liar on the inside.

 What your ego does not tell you is that healing your inner child is really just like having your best friend come over with ice cream and waiting to exhale when your life sucks.

I consider healing my inner child a practice in fusion.

You are every age you’ve ever been, but most of us have no real idea what we were like at any age.

Somehow we grow up without ever mourning the loss of who we used to be. Five-year-old Janika is not thirty-four-year-old Janika. There are so many things she doesn’t know yet. She doesn’t know she will lose her precious Grandfather in ten short years, or that same year she loses this great love she will find her first romantic love. So many things she never expected are going to happen and her heart will learn to break in ways she never imagined possible.

All these sweet noble ideas of the world she has will one day be crushed because when she was reading the fairy tales she mostly saw the happy endings not the treacherous battle.

Those little people are still there inside of all of us nursing battle wounds and broken hearts without the emotional capability of a grown up to deal with it all. They are Banging from the inside to be acknowledged. We have to go back for them so we can grow up and be who we always wanted to be. You aren’t getting there without them.

Next time you are trolling facebook while peeing and you see a post that reminds you of some deep sedded scared over injury. You know the one that makes you a little jealous, or irritated. Thos jabs are intentional. Thats your soul reminding you there is work to do and none of it includes eating shit ass food, mocking yoga, or watching reality TV. That’s your soul telling you that being lame is awesome and you really need to heal your inner child.